Bad Mommy Blogger!

I just don't have time to write anymore! A few quick highlights:

*Lucy started daycare on August 9! She is doing well and seems to really like it. I miss her so much while I am at work, but picking her up is the absolute BEST feeling in the world. (Nanny vs. daycare is a LONG story!)

*My little peanut loves to eat fruit, cheese, and puffs. Veggies are hit and miss lately, but I think she's playing me... she eats them at daycare just fine! She still nurses on demand at home and takes 3 four-ounce bottles at school.

*She crawls everywhere now. EVERYWHERE! She is amazingly mobile and I love it! I think she will be walking sooner rather than later and she is loving her new independence. (Isn't she lovely... I know I am biased!)

*Lucy clap clap claps all the time. She thinks she is the bee's knees... and I do too!

*Taking after her Mama, Lucy is a big talker! She loves to say da da da ahhhh dah, yayaya, and lots of other fun syllables. Still looking for a Mama in there!

*My girl is so happy. Apparently lack of sleep doesn't phase her one bit because she is seriously such a happy girl. Labor Day weekend was one of the best weekends of my life because I got to spend it with such a happy baby. I stare at her in awe that we created such a perfect little human. I love her so much. (I know the look on her face in this picture is goofy, but it cracks me up!)

Mommy Guilt

I can't believe Sunday is the first day of August (we are going to the beach, but that's a whole separate story!) and school is starting back in two weeks. I have had SO much fun this summer with my sweet snuggle puppy. Her personality is so cute and she is so much fun. Even on our "bad" days, I LOVE love love staying home with her. It sucks to go back to work :(

We have been interviewing nannies for the last few weeks and I *think* that we have found someone. I am having so much anxiety this go round when deciding between hiring a nanny and going the daycare route. When I went back to work in March, I knew a nanny was right for us. i wasn't ready to send her to daycare, but now I am having some nagging thoughts in the back of my head. Wouldn't it be good for her to play with other kids? Is she going to get bored over the next year? Won't she benefit from the diversity of kids at daycare? Ugh. Lucy had (has?) a spot at the daycare beside my school, but we didn't send in our deposit two weeks ago when they called to say the spot was ours, so I am pretty sure they aren't just holding it for us, making all of these thoughts a moot point anyway.

Although it shouldn't matter when it comes to the care of our sweet girl, a nanny is also going to wind up costing us quite a bit more for this year as well. The girl we have tentatively offered the job too negotiated the salary and now I feel that my entire paycheck seriously is going to child care. I know that me working for at least this next year is the best choice for our family so that we can hopefully sell this house and buy a new one, but man... it stinks! I am also just nervous about starting a new school year and balancing out all of those responsibilities (and the beginning of the year is SOO BUSY) and my time with Lucy. *deep breaths*

I should mention that Andrew definitely wants to go the nanny route because he likes being able to come home throughout the day and see Lucy and he loves that we don't have to pack her up and drop her off somewhere. I like that part too. I like that she gets to be home with her things, her dogs, her crib. I like that her routine stays pretty much the same during the week and on the weekends. I like that the nanny can take her to Gymboree, to the library, to Target. I like that she can still take walks around the neighborhood with her little friends, just like we've done all summer. (Here is where the mommy guilt comes in to play big time - I want to be the one to do all those things with her!)

In other news, we got back from our trip visiting family in New York on Sunday and she has settled wonderfully back into our summertime routine. She has even been taking some decent crib naps... woohoo! She is trying to wave and scooting all over the place and is basically the cutest baby ever (ok, I might be a little biased, but still!).

Check out my cutie!

See why I want to stay home with her?! :)

Cutest.Thing.Ever!!

Where's Lucy?!

There she is!!

Sick Snuggle Puppy :( and Summertime Routine

Lucy is sick for the first time :( Poor monkey. I trusted my mommy gut and took her to the doctor today and yep - double ear infection. Ouch. No wonder she has been so slimy, snotty, coughy, clingy, fussy. She got some antibiotics and I am sure she will be back to her happy, bouncy self in no time!

Still pretty cute, no?

We've had a busy few weeks getting into our summer routine, but it is so, so, so much fun! We

go to a music class on Tuesdays, to Gymboree on Wednesdays, play dates with our friends, shopping - I just love spending so much time with this little girl! We just got back from our trip to Maryland on Sunday and Lucy was a rock star! I am so proud of her for being such a pleasant, flexible baby when her whole routine was turned upside down! Speaking of routines, I have been working hard to get Lucy to start napping in her crib (as opposed to her swing - she is just getting too big and she was super restless) and I think *knock on wood* that I am starting to be successful! She doesn't take long naps, but I am not too surprised - this kid is not a sleeper!

Most days look something like this:

6:00 Wake up, Nurse, Playtime downstairs

7:00 Run with Mommy, or walk if she is fighting the stroller

She still hates the BOB, but I am trying to run with her at least 3 times a week so hopefully she will get used to it soon. We usually spend close to an hour and a half outside in the mornings before it gets too hot. We see the neighborhood off, waving to all the people and the dogs! It is dorky, but fun!

9:00 Nurse, Nap

Mommy takes world's fastest shower and gets ready because nap usually only lasts 30 minutes if I'm lucky!

10:00 Nurse, "Breakfast"

Usually oatmeal with pureed apples or pears

10:30 Leave for morning activity

Grocery shopping, Target, Music, Playdate... whatever!

12:30 Home to start the afternoon nap battle, Nurse and story first

My goal is to get this afternoon nap to an hour, so 1:00-2:00... longerwould be even better! We're working on it! She gets so sleepy, but just wakes up after 45 minutes or so. If I drive her around in the car, she'll sleep for close to two hours, so I know she needs the sleep. I am definitely learning all the back roads!

2:00 or 3:00 Nurse, Run errands, Play time

5:00 Nurse, Neighborhood walk or pool time with Daddy and neighborhood friends

6:30 "Dinner" Some sort of veggie puree

(We've tried sweet potatoes, peas, butternut squash, carrots, and zucchini is next!)

7:00 Bath and jammies

7:30 Nurse and bed

She's still up A LOT during the night, but I am okay with it. Mostly. She still needs me and I want to be there for her, so for now, this is what works. I secretly hope that better daytime naps will be key to better nighttime sleep, but I haven't seen any evidence of that so far. :)

Wouldn't you love to spend all summer with this beauty?! :)

Bouncy Baby!

Adventures in Solid Foods and Teeth!

Now that my Snuggle Puppy is six months old, we have embarked on introducing solids and it has been soooo much fun! I love to watch her try and experience new things! For a variety of reasons, we decided to wait until six months to introduce solids, but that doesn't mean that I wasn't chomping at the bit to get started! I decided to make all of her baby food myself (that's the plan for now anyway), which, if you know me and my experience in the kitchen, is really saying a lot.I decided it would be easier to cook in batches and just freeze individual portions in ice cube trays. It has been super nice this past week to just take a cube out, defrost it, and feed her. No muss, no fuss! Last Sunday, I cooked sweet potato, butternut squash, and carrots. (We decided to use organics for Lucy so I feel really good about what we're giving her. I buy organic as much as possible for us, but sometimes, it just doesn't see, worth the price.)

We gave her sweet potatoes first. She liked them , but I think I made them a little too thick. She was excited to grab the spoon and put it in her mouth and to squish the sweet potato around in her fingers. Every time she went to swallow, though, she would grimace and gag a little. Figuring out how to get that new texture down is hard work! :)

After three days of sweet potato, we moved on to butternut squash. She LOVED this! I made this much, much thinner and I think the consistency was just right. She squealed with delight every time I brought the spoon toward her mouth and would attack it like a bird attacking a worm! It was adorable! I found that giving her a spoon to play with made it much easier for me to make sure the food got in her mouth because she had a spoon to keep her hands busy and wasn't trying to grab (and fling) the one that I was using!

Last night, after three days of squash, we introduced carrots. They were a little thicker but she did a pretty good job with them. It was late and she still ate half a serving. After our three days of carrots, we are going to move on to some green vegetables (I wonder if she will share my love for peas!) and then maybe add in some fruits!

For now, we are just doing one solids meal a day and that works for us. I am not giving her rice cereal because I don't see that it has much nutritional benefit, but I have some on hand that I can use to mix with different foods. I have some oatmeal too, so when we add in a breakfast meal, we might see how she likes that mixed with fruit.

This whole eating real food thing is a messy business :) She dives in with her whole body and we usually both end up covered in some sticky orange goo!

In other news and updates, I am officially finished with school for the year and ready to spend the whole summer soaking in some Lucy! She is at such a fun age and she is non-stop active! She can pull up to stand, stand while holding on to things for super periods of time, scooch all around... she is amazing! She still is not world's best sleeper (read: up every 2 hours), but I am hopeful that getting her on a good routine these next few weeks will help. Otherwise, we will re-visit sleep training of some sort. I know she is capable of sleeping in longer stretches (even though it has never actually happened!) and I definitely know that as active as she is she needs good sleep. So we'll see!

Also - and this is huge people - we have a tooth! I haven't been able to get a good picture of it yet, but there is definitely a pearly white poking through. I first spotted it Memorial Day weekend and it took a good week to cut through the gum (poor baby), but now it is very visible and we are just waiting for it to grow some more! I can't believe my little tiny baby is old enough for a tooth! When we first spotted it, we were in the car on a short 2-hour trip for a cookout. She was asleep in her seat and then woke up SCREAMING! I climbed in the back to see what was up and there it was! I was so shocked that I teared up a little - she is growing so fast!

We have her six month pediatrician appointment tomorrow and I am excited to see her stats! She is so wonderful and amazing and fun - I love this girl!

*yawn*

Life is crazy hectic right now! That is usually how I like it best, but I.am.tired!

The school year is quickly coming to a close... I am so excited that there are only three weeks left! Of course, these three weeks are jam-packed with assessments, projects, and end-of-the-year activities, so it isn't exactly smooth sailing, but I can definitely see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am very excited to spend the summer with my snuggle puppy! We are going to sign up for gymboree classes, go to story time at the library, and spend time with our friends at the pool! Plus our trips - we are going to be busy!

Lucy spent her first night away from home last night - we spent the night at my parents' new house! The house is lovely... but Lucy didn't think sleeping there was all that much fun. I am not too surprised. Sleeping isn't really her thing! :)

In Lucy news, she is developing the most fun, amazing personality! I love her to pieces am so excited to see what new stuff she comes up with every day! She loves to explore and watch everything! She got to go to the zoo with my class this past week and my first graders had the BEST time with her! They thought she was so much fun, and she was totally in awe of them! It was so much fun to share her with them.

Lucy went to a birthday party last weekend for her friend Carter! The party was at Gymboree and she loved scooching around on the mats and hitting the air tube and the balls! She has also been spending a lot of time with her friend Samir (who is 8 days younger than she is) and it is so cute to watch them recognize and interact with each other!

I have tons of cute new pictures to download to my computer, so hopefully I can get them on here soon... but now it is 8:00 and I am heading to bed :) My little alarm clock will be waking me up every two hours, and this mama needs to catch up on some zzzz's!

I am one lucky Mama!

My first Mother's Day as a mom - Wow! I can't imagine anything better, any greater job in the world, than being Lucy's mommy. She is so incredible and I love love love being her mom!

I told Andrew that I didn't want to do anything special for Mother's Day. He and Lucy

both show me every day how much they love me, so I didn't feel like we needed to go all out just for this one day. On Friday night, Lucy gave me a card that was so perfectly sweet and summed up how I imagine she feels about me so perfectly. He even handprinted her little hand so she could sign it herself! :) There was also a gift certificate for a pedicure! Yesterday, we went on several long walks, went "swimming" in the baby pool, and then had the most fun dinner outside at Bocci! Lucy was such a little ham, LOVED going to look at the fountain, and even sat in the highchair while we ate! When we put her to bed and spent the rest of the evening catching up on DVR, I couldn't help thinking that I can never remember being so happy. This morning, I got another very sweet (mushy) card from Andrew and another gift certificate for a pedicure! This Mama will have nice-looking toes this summer :)

Lucy is at such a fun age right now! I can't believe how active and into everything she is!

*She is so excited and curious about everything that it takes her forever to nurse! Its so cute, though, so I don't mind!

*She rolls, rolls, rolls! She can get to wherever she wants to go by rolling!

*She is starting to scoo

ch forward. She puts her arms down, then pulls her knees in to her chest to kind of propel herself. Soooo cute!

*We have started taking our nightly walks with a lot of the babies in the neighborhood! It has been so nice to meet families with kids and Lucy loves spending time with the other babies! We have gotten pretty close with one family who has a son 8 days younger than Lucy! He has a ton of hair and Lucy loves to reach out and touch it!

*She is making A LOT more sounds! M, N, and B sounds are now distinguishable. We are working on Mama! :)

*Lucy loves books! We can sit her in our laps and read her a whole story, and she will look up and smile between pages! (PS - nothing will ever melt my heart as much as seeing Andrew read to his daughter! Eeeeek!)

*We are starting to be able to go for short walks in the stroller! She still much prefers the baby Bjorn, but is has been SO hot, so it is nice to be able to use the stroller for short strolls around the block!

*My Camelbak water bottle is Lucy's favorite thing ever! She loves to suck on the straw part, and we think she may have even been able to get a little bit of water up a few times! The amount of drool she can produce while sucking on it is ridiculous!

*My little ham loves it when we clap for her! "Yay Lucy!" is a common phrase at

our house!

*She is learning how to play peek-a-boo and thinks it is hilarious if she gets to pull the cloth off herself!

We are so excited about all of the fun things we have planned in the next month! Lucy has been invited to TWO birthday parties (Gavin is turning one, and a little boy in our neighborhood who walks with us is turning one also!), we are going to spend the night at Nana and Papa Jeff's new house, another trip to the zoo, starting some solids when Lucy turns 6 months (we're in no rush, but I do think it will be a lot of fun!), an end of the year pool party for school... and of course, summer is so close I can taste it! I can't wait to spend 8 weeks with my sweet girl! We are going to Maryland, New York and hopefully a weekend at the beach!

See what I mean? I am one lucky Mama! :)

Quote to live by :)

“When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents’ enjoyment of their babies, it’s rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep.” James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame

Ask me how my baby sleeps. Yesterday, I would have told you she was a terrible sleeper. Up every hour and a half to two hours all night long. I would have told you how tired I was and how I wished she would sleep for just one long stretch. I would have told you how I longed for four or five hours of consecutive sleep for myself.

Ask me how my baby sleeps. Today, and from here on out, I will tell you she sleeps great for Lucy. I will secretly smile to myself, knowing what a HUGE improvement we have made. How two hours is so much better than waking every 45 minutes. Today, I will smile and tell you how happy I am that she sleeps in her crib, holding her pink bunny lovey between her two little hands. How sweet it is when I go in to get her that she grasps the bunny ears and lifts it out of the crib with her. I will think to myself about how lucky I am to have those nighttime nursing sessions with her. How that is OUR time that can't be taken away. How I am secretly pleased that she needs me, and wants me!

Tonight, when I wake up at 12, then 2, then 3:30 and 5, I will happily, albeit sleepily, walk to her room, and quietly lift her from her crib. I will kiss her soft forehead, and let her squeeze my finger as she nurses for five or ten minutes. I will give her another kiss before I put her back down, and pat her little diaper butt and whisper "Night night monkey" as she goes back to sleep. This is our peaceful nighttime routine, and this is what is working for us.

Lucy's sleeping is normal - it is normal for Lucy. Someday, I am going to miss this!

Baby Laughs Can Heal Your Soul

So so true! I love this little girl so much, and the fact that she is starting to laugh and squeal constantly makes me fall in love with her all over again every day. I am having so much fun with her as her little personality develops more every day!

I swear, our weekends are so much fun now that I told Andrew we needed to start having less fun so Mondays wouldn't suck so bad! (totally kidding baby!) Even doing simple things like yard work, which we spent a lot of this weekend doing, are so much more fun now! Lucy had a great time "helping" - she played in her tent on the driveway while we worked outside. She loves being outside so much, and would have happily spent the entire weekend there!

I took this picture with my phone, so it looks kind of rough, but she is having so much fun in her tent playing with her toes! So cute!

Going to Target and grocery shopping and eating at the "same old" places are also so much m

ore fun now that we have a curious little monkey who loves to be out and about! She squeals and screams with delight as we walk through the stores, and I LOVE seeing and hearing people comment on how cute she is (what can I say, I love attention!)!

We made a big purchase this weekend and bought a BOB revolution. Even though you can't really run with a baby until they are a bit older, we will still be able to do some loops around the neighborhood. I took her out today, and she didn't love it, but I didn't really except her to. She hates her other stroller (the City Mini) and much prefers to be carried in the Baby Bjorn. We'll keep working on it, though, and I am confident by this summer she and I will have lots of fun running together and training for my half marathon!

I am trying to get video of Lucy laughing and rolling, but she is such a busy baby that I can never get the Flip out in time! Over night, it seems, she is rolling all over the place and working hard on scooting on her belly! I got overwhelmed tonight because I don't think I'm quite ready to have a mobile baby... but she sure is ready to move! It is so exciting to watch her learn new things!

Roly Poly Giggly Baby

Do you know what I love love love love?? The sound of little tiny baby giggles! Lucy giggled for the first time on Thursday while we were at the doctor for her 4 month check up and shots (before the shots!). It is the sweetest little sound in the entire world! I have spent the last 3 days trying to get her to do it again, but all I've gotten is a tiny little one last night before her bath... and some blank stares as I am sure she is wondering what her crazy mommy is doing!

Lucy has been sleeping in her crib since last Friday night and is doing well! Sleep "training" is hard, but every night gets a little better. She is going down like a champ and usually only has one bout of crying during the night. We are "making" her go three hours between feedings, which she is more than capable of, although sometimes she wakes up after 2 and fusses for a bit before going back to sleep.

She is the cutest little sleeper. She likes to sleep on her side in the fetal position with her hands right by her mouth. The only problem she has is that she keeps rolling to her belly in her sleep and then waking up mad! She has been rolling belly to back for about 6ish weeks now so in theory she shouldn't have a problem getting back to a comfy position - but she does! Hopefully she will start to figure it out, but for now, it is pretty funny!

Lucy's 4 month pediatrician appointment was Thursday and she only got 2 vaccines (and 1 was oral) and she did great! She weights 12 pounds, 5 ounces and is 23 inches long. She is still a tiny little peanut, but hey - somebody has to be small! Lucy has to go for a hip ultrasound in the next 2 weeks because the doctor noticed asymmetrical folds in her little thighs and her right hip is a little clicky (do you like those medical terms?). Hopefully it will be something we can just watch and she will outgrow, but worse case scenario she will need a little brace. Hopefully we will know more soon. Other than that, my giggly roly poly baby is doing great!

Dying Easter eggs!

Sleep Training - Night 1

I hate the term "sleep training." It sounds like something you do to a dog. "Oh, let's train Fido to sleep. Good boy, Fido. Here's a treat. No, no Fido. We don't stay awake all night." Anyway, we bit the bullet. I know that sleep training in a young infant is somewhat controversial, but we made the decision that would work best for our family.

After 4 months of a battle to get Lucy down at night (and not even in her crib - anywhere!) and up to 8 or 9 wakings, we knew we had to do something. Our poor baby was not getting good night time sleep, and neither were we! After a trip to the pediatrician to make sure there was no medical reason why she was having such trouble sleeping (there wasn't, and our pediatrician recommended some form of sleep training), I decided to amp up my arsenal of knowledge and figure out how to help my baby. I read these (which in and of itself is a feat with a 4 month old who fights sleep like no other and a full time job):

Before going into all of this, I was adamant that I was not going to try any method that involved crying. I did NOT want to put my baby through anything where she would "suffer." After reading the books and looking at past blogs and posts about Lucy's sleep, it was clear to me that our main problem was Lucy's sleep associations. We have a GREAT bedtime routine (if I do say so myself): she gets a warm bath, lotion and massage, jammies, a story or a song, and nurses off into dreamland. Daddy turns on her "music" - white noise - and humidifier and turns off the lights, and Mommy rocks and feeds Lucy until she falls asleep. All perfectly peaceful (much more peaceful when we moved bedtime up to between 7 and 8 - she was way too overtired with a later bedtime). The problem came when we would try to move her to her crib or bassinet. If she didn't wake up right away, which she often did, less than an hour later she would be up with blood curdling screams.

Let's use this analogy: if you are asleep in your bed at night, and your pillow falls on the floor, you can quickly replace it without even realizing that you woke to do it. BUT, if you awake to realize someone moved your pillow to another room, you would wake more fully, becoming angry that things were not how you left them when you went to sleep. This is exactly what was happening to Lucy - she was falling asleep very contently in my warm arms, sucking while I rocked her. Then we were moving her to her cold(ish), still bed, with nothing to suck on. She was waking up pissed! :) The cycle continued all.night.long. I could get her back to sleep fairly easily by nursing or rocking her, but each time her sleep cycle ended, she would need me to get back to sleep (instead of being able to automatically shift into a new sleep cycle, which we all do without even realizing it). At almost twelve pounds and four months, there is absolutely no reason why I would need to feed her every hour.

We had to figure out our ultimate goal: for us, it was to get Lucy to sleep easily *in her crib* and to cut down on night-time wakings. After reading and researching and pulling my hair out, we decided a modified Ferber approach would work best for us. Ferber has a bad rap as the "cry it out" guy, and I did NOT want to let my baby cry. However, Pantley's NCSS methods didn't provide me much insight into how to get Lucy down initially at night, and that was/is a huge problem for us. We did spend a few nights at the beginning of this week with the Pick Up/Put Down method, but it was impossible to do that all night long and we were making no progress. Soooo...

Lucy was super sleepy last night after a day of bad naps (which I think correlates directly with poor nighttime sleep) and after a fun dinner and some shopping, we came home and did our bedtime routine. I fed her in our chair and snuggled with her (maybe whispering how sorry I was - I knew what was to come, she didn't!). As soon as she unlatched, I stood up, gave her a kiss and told her I loved her, and we put her in her crib. *Then we walked out of the room.* She was still awake, and she screamed and cried. It was so sad - so sad, in fact, that I put a pillow over my ears and shed a few tears myself. Luckily, the first interval is only 3 minutes, so after 3 minutes of crying, I literally ran down the hall to her room. Ferber doesn't advocate picking up the baby to soothe them, but I had to. I scooped her up, covered her little tear-soaked head in kisses (while Andrew rubbed my back and whispered that it was okay), and told her I loved her. After a minute, we put her back down and left the room again. This time, we had to be gone for five minutes... it felt like hours. After the five minutes passed (and she was still screaming and crying), we ran back to her room again. Again, I picked her up and covered her in kisses and cursed Dr. Ferber. Again, we put her back down and left the room, this time for 10 whole minutes. Also, I should note for my own memory, each of the times we went in to soothe her, she did NOT stop crying or settle down, and according to "the books," that is okay. The point is to let her know that we are there, we didn't go away (and to reassure ourselves that she is still okay, despite the cries!). After 10 more minutes of crying, I almost caved. I wanted so badly to bring her swing to her room (as we have been doing) and let my poor baby get some sleep because I knew she was so exhausted. However, I did not want to undue the 18 minutes we had just done. I didn't want her to have cried like that for nothing, and Andrew did a great job of reminding me that we were helping her. Better sleep would mean a happier baby.

The second 10 minute interval proved to be the winner. We left her room and she cried for maybe 6 more minutes. Then... quiet. We were both afraid to move for fear of waking her up. We sat in our room very, very still for about 10 minutes. Then, curiosity got the better of Andrew and he walked down the hall to her room. He came back with a triumphant look on his face - she was asleep! We were thrilled! 28 minutes in the grand scheme of things didn't seem so bad - I had read that it could take hours! I jumped in the shower and was taking my time... and then I heard her crying on the monitor. Grrr... she had only been asleep for 38 minutes.

Using our approach, at each waking we started back with 3 minute intervals (then 5, then repeating 10s). This time, she fell asleep in the first 10 minute interval. We were bursting with pride! I decided to get some sleep at this point (10:00), knowing it could be a long night. Before I fell asleep, we decided that any time after 12:30 she woke, I would feed her (as our ultimate goal is not to eliminate nighttime feedings, but just to reduce the frequency). She slept until *12:45*! Holy hell - that was almost 3 hours! When I heard her at 12:45, I rushed to her room, kissed her all over, and nursed her in our glider. When she finished eating, I sat her up and burped her, ensuring that she was awake, although drowsy. I placed her in the crib.... and didn't hear a peep!!! She went right to sleep!

We decided that if she woke again before 3:30 (almost 3 hours between feedings - totally doable for her), we would not feed her, but instead start the intervals again. While I was secretly hoping she would do another 3 hour stretch so we could avoid the intervals all together, I knew it wasn't likely. And I was right. :) She woke up about 2:15 and we went in after 3 minutes. Still crying. Went in after 5 minutes. Still crying. Sh!t. This was harder still in the middle of the night. After 10 minutes, she wasn't crying, though still fussing so definitely not asleep. We waited an extra 10 minutes since she wasn't crying, but she started all out wailing again, so we went in to comfort her. I didn't pick her up. Six minutes after we left... asleep! Go Lucy!

She woke again around 4, and I knew at this point she was ready to eat. I followed the same routine as the 1245 feeding, and had the same great success. She ate, burped, and went right back to sleep. We didn't hear her again until 7:00!

I was greeted this morning by that sweet, gummy smile I love so much. My irrational fears that she would hate me were dissipated as she grabbed my hair while I changed her and flirted with me as she nursed. I don't think I have ever had more fun during our morning play time, and my snuggle puppy is now napping sweetly in her swing.

As a parent, this is definitely the hardest thing I have had to do. I want my baby to be happy and well-rested. I want her to feel safe and secure. I know that we are just starting this craziness. Tonights intervals are longer (5, 7, 12) and I know it will suck. However, I know we can do it. I know she can do it... and I will be so proud of her in the morning. By letting her cry (in a controlled, safe place for a reasonable amount of time), I *am* being a good mommy. I am helping her to learn a life skill that she needs to know. I will be waking up to feed her one or two times a night for a few more months (hopefully!), and I think we will cherish those times together - especially since it won't be every hour!

Sweet dreams baby girl... Mommy loves you!

**I want to add that my husband was an absolute rock last night. I know it killed him, too, to hear her be upset, and while he hasn't done the extensive research that I have, he really wants to help Lucy get better nighttime sleep. Every time I was ready to give up, he kept reminding me how we were doing this to help her and how much happier she would be. He also kept telling me how proud he was of me and how much he loved me. I've got a keeper there, folks. :) **

Snuggle Puppy Updates

I know I am biased, but isn't she a cutie?!

Now... what we've been up to:

*Lucy now likes to ride in her Baby Bjorn (after almost 4 months of hating the stroller and the carrier, this is huge). She LOVES to be outside and if 1:00 rolls around and she hasn't been out yet, she starts to scream at us!

*Speaking of, she has recently discovered that her sweet little vocal chords can make a very loud sound at a very high pitch and she loves loves loves to scream. She isn't mad - she is just experimenting (take that lady at B&N who looked at me with judgey eyes!).

*Two weeks ago, Lucy started splashing in the bath tub. She especially likes it when the water gets on her face!

*Lucy has started tripoding! That means she can sit up using her hands to support her. I don't have any pictures of this because I am a nervous nellie and am too afraid to walk away when she is doing it!

*I think I've already mentioned this, but on 3/14 we moved Lucy to her big-girl convertible carseat. While she still doesn't love it, if she is sleepy she will at least fall asleep in it (instead of getting completely over-tired and falling to pieces). The only down side to this is that if she falls asleep on then ten minute car ride home, she thinks that is enough of a nap and fights going back down!

*TOES!! Lucy loves her toes and spends hours every day trying to figure out how to get them into her mouth :) Sometimes I help her!

*Lucy LOVES her exersuacer now! Her feet can just barely reach the bottom and she loves being Miss Independent and playing with the toys. She only lasts about 15 minutes, though, before she has to explore something else!

*Lucy had her first picnic and swinging adventure (3/31) and loved being outside on the blanket, but wasn't a huge fan of the swing. We'll try again soon!

*Sleep. Well... we're still working on it. I am reading some books and doing some research and we will probably start some formal sleep training in the next few weeks. She hates being put down in her crib and still wakes 6-7 times a night - this mama is tired!

Back to Work and Learning New Things

We survived! My first week back to work, that is :) Was it fun? No. Did I cry every night? Maybe. But we did it, and I am sure we can do the next 10 weeks too! Lucy actually fared far better than I did. Our nanny is wonderful and so good with her, and I feel so comfortable knowing that Lucy is at home. We are super lucky too because Andrew is able to check in at lunch every day. Our nanny also sends me texts and pictures throughout the day so I feel very in the loop. I love to see how she dresses Lucy every day!

Our new schedule is EXHAUSTING! I get up at 5, pump, shower and get dressed, feed Lucy and am at the door by 6:30. I get to school by 7 and have half an hour to get set up for the day. Then, I teach from 7:30-2:30, pumping three times in there. There is NO time to do anything and I think my stress level is impacting how much milk I get when I pump. Hopefully I will settle in and be able to produce more this week. I see my kiddos off at by 3:00, leave school by 3:15, home by 3:45. I feed and play with Lucy until between 6:30 and 7 (boo for not a whole lot of time with her!), then we do her bath and bedtime routine. She still is not sleeping well at all, so on a good night it takes until 8 to get her to bed (don't even ask about a bad night!). At 8, I eat dinner, wash bottles and pump parts, prepare bottles for the next day, and pack my lunch for school. THEN, I finally get to prepare my lessons and activities for the next day. I try to be in bed by 10. In theory, I would get 7 hours of sleep, but Lucy is still waking every hour. I am one tired mama! :)

We are actually going to see her pediatrician on Monday to see if we can get to the bottom of this sleep thing. She does well in her swing - it is just when we lay her flat on her back. She screams and screams like she is in pain. She wakes up from a deep sleep screaming. It is almost like she can't transition from one sleep cycle to the next. My poor baby :( Hopefully we can get to the bottom of this soon!

In other news, Lucy has hit this amazing developmental growth spurt! She is learning all kinds of new things and gets so proud of herself! She has been rolling from belly to back for awhile now, but it always required this great production. Now, as soon as she is put on her tummy, she flops right over, and then gets this HUGE grin on her face! She has also learned how to splash in the bath tub! It is the funniest thing. She will wait until the cup of water is being poured over her and then just flail her arms and legs as fast as she can! Silly girl! She entered the phase of "I must taste everything" and now puts everything in her mouth. If we hold a toy up to her face, she grabs it and pulls it in close to "kiss" it! On Friday, she even tried tasting her toes! I don't thinks she liked them too much!

Another big new thing for Lucy is her new carseat! She has hated hated hated her infant seat since day 1, so we finally just bought a convertible to see if she would like it more. We figured we were going to need one anyone, and if it makes riding more pleasant for her, why not? We got the Graco MyRide65, and we love it! Lucy did great her first trip out in it, and although she wasn't a huge fan yesterday, we are hopeful that the angle of this seat makes her much more comfortable.

I need to download newest pictures... stay tuned for those!

Who Needs Sleep?

Well... I do. :) And Daddy and the dogs wouldn't mind it either. So why oh why are we up all night?

Lucy, the love and light of my life, has many good qualities. Her little personality is developing so much. She is so smart and strong and wonderful. However, sleep is not her thing. She is a

terrible sleeper. Pretty much from the beginning, she has had sleep issues. She hated to be on

her back for the first 6 weeks of her life. So she slept in her swing. Then, we tried to get her to sleep in her bassinet. No dice. We tried to get her to sleep in her crib. No dice. Bassinet again. Nope. Finally, we ended up letting her sleep in our bed. Not ideal and none of us were happy with it, but at least she was sleeping. A few weeks ago, we decided we needed to move her back to her crib. In preparing to go back to work, I needed her to be in her crib or else I was afraid she would be 6 months old before we could make the move!

We used to put Lucy down between 9 and 10 - basically around the time we were winding down for the night. Even when sleeping in our bed, she would scream throughout her last nursing session of the night - pulling on and off, fussing, grunting, crying. It really wasn't pleasant for anyone and I felt so bad that the end of my poor baby's day was so traumatic. After doing some reading and internet searching, I decided that we were letting her get overtired. She always always always want(ed) to take a nap between 630 and 7 - and we would wake her up so she would "go to bed." Then the fussing and crankiness would ensue. Light bulb moment - she was ready for bed, not a nap! We started doing her bedtime routine at the first signs of tiredness and she is so much more fun to put to sleep now! No more screaming - just eating and rocking! Love it!

One hurdle crossed - but we still have major problems. Lucy will sleep from 7-10 (actually the past two nights she was woken up half an hour after going down and then we had to do the whole rock/nurse thing again!) but after 10 she has been waking up every.single.hour. Seriously - every hour between 10 and 6. Holy exhausting! Everyone at the T household is running on fumes. We swaddle her, we play white noise, she has a velour crib sheet, her mattress is inclined - what more can we do? It is frustrating, to say the least. She isn't waking up hungry

(she eats maybe two or three of those EIGHT wakings) but she is definitely waking up crying. We try just rubbing her tummy or quietly letting her know we are there, but if we don't pick her up, her cries escalate to all out wails - which increases the amount of time we are all awake.

Poor Lucy :( Last night, Andrew put our sleep position wedge thing in her crib around 130, and that bought us a 3 hour stretch! We will definitely be trying that again tonight in hopes that we can all get more sleep!

Even though our nights are long, our days with Lucy are so much fun. She is smiling at everything and learning new things every day. She still hates her carseat and stroller, so there's a good chance that Lucy is going to get her "big girl" carseat this weekend! We think she might like it better because it sits a little more upright, and our monkey is always trying to sit up! It can be rear facing for up to 40 pounds, too, so I think she will still be perfectly safe!

We are sadly getting ready for the end of my maternity leave, but we still feel very lucky to have found such a great nanny! Do you think she will have fun with this little girl or what? :)

Great news!! and some updates :)

I would love love love love love love love LOVE to be able to stay home with Lucy every day, but unfortunately the time for me to go back to work is fast approaching. I have two weeks left with my little lady and I plan on soaking them up and soaking her in.

Before Lucy was even born, she was on the waiting list at three different daycares. One of the daycares (the best one, the greatest one, the perfect one) is literally right next door to my school, and even though it seemed highly unlikely they would have a mid-year opening, I was still optimistic and hopeful that Lucy would get a spot there. It would have been great - I could have nursed her lunch, dropped her off at the last possible minute, and picked her up right after dismissal. She could have come to my classroom to finish up any work before we went home. However - that was too good to be true! :) She is still on the wait list there, and IF I do go back to work next year, there is a very strong possibility she will spend her days there.

Even once I knew that daycare was out, I wasn't too worried because she got a spot at a center near our house. We had toured this center late in my pregnancy and they seemed good. Not great. Not wonderful. But good. The biggest downside is how far a drive it is from my school - it took me 37 minutes to get there the day we toured. Because Andrew travels around so much, I hated the though of her being sick and it taking so long for me to get to her. Plus, it meant it would be that much longer before I get to see her every afternoon.

Once Lucy was born and we started to get to know her little personality, I started to get really nervous about sending her to daycare. She is not world's best sleeper (ha!), she naps in her swing every day, and she hates hates hates riding in the car. I didn't want her to have to start and end her day doing things she hates. Plus, she was going to have to share attention with three other babies (this center has a 4:1 ratio). Andrew and I started tossing around the idea of hiring a nanny, and the more we thought about it, the better it sounded. Not only would Lucy be able to stay at her house every day, but Andrew will be able to see her most days when he comes home for lunch! It also means we won't be paying for childcare over the summer when we don't need it!

We interviewed several people by phone and two people in person and I am thrilled that we have found someone who I think will be just perfect! She is 25, getting married in June, very sweet and has wonderful references. When we met her, she took to Lucy right away and seemed very comfortable holding her, talking to her, just being around her. She is going to come over next week one day to "play," and then babysit for us one evening to troubleshoot any possible issues. I feel so good that Lucy is going to get to stay in her comfortable home with someone who will love her and care for her. Our nanny even promised to send me hourly text messages and pictures - do you think she picked up on my neurotic tendencies? :) SO - even though I hate the thought of leaving my sweet monkey, I am happy with our solution. And it is only three months. I can do three months. Then we will reassess!

In other big news - Lucy's cousin is here! My brother and his wife had a sweet baby girl on Monday! It will be so fun in July when we get the babies together :)

Lucy is still not sleeping well at night and logistically I am starting to get worried. I have not slept longer than two hours at time in a week (which means she hasn't either!). She isn't waking up hungry all of these times, although she will usually nurse just a little. I have put her new super soft sheet (just like her changing pad cover) in her crib and we are going to give it the old college try again this weekend. I really don't mind waking up with her at night, but I do wish she would give us at least one good long stretch. I am worried that she isn't getting enough nighttime sleep. I wish she had an instruction manual! :)

Even in our sleep deprived state, Lucy is still such a joy! She is generally a happy smiley baby when she is awake (as long as we stay home... she still hates her carseat which leads trips out to be a little hectic!). She is starting to show a lot of interest in her toys that light up, especially her little laptop! It is hilarious to watch her with such concentration as she "works." We spend most evenings playing this way and laughing with our peanut!

I know she looks floppy in this picture, but she really does a great job of sitting up in her Bumbo!

I'm a dork :)

Lucy and I played around and did a vlog update on Friday... check it out! :)

*And excuse the nursing tank on me and Lucy's jammies... it was a lazy day!

Sleeping FAIL

Remember that big news? About my great sleeper? hmmm... well, not so much :)

Lucy is on a sleeping strike now. She has decided that it is WAY more fun to stay up all day and all night and get super over-tired and scream. Mommy and Daddy don't think it is so fun.

Poor little Lucy got her 2 month vaccines on Friday. I can't say enough good things about our pediatrician and the nurse. The nurse seriously had those shots over with so fast I didn't even know she had done them. Poor Lucy didn't even cry until she was finished, but she was so sad. She opened her mouth to scream but was so upset, no sound came out. She just turned bright purple and then a few seconds later, super sad screams. I was very proud of her, though - she calmed down as soon as I fed her and then took a LONG nap. She was pretty fussy for the next three days, so I know she wasn't feeling great. Poor baby.

As for her sleeping strike, we don't really know what to do at this point. She hates to be swaddled. HATES IT. She spends so much time fighting it that it almost isn't worth it to swaddle her anymore. On the other hand, when she isn't swaddled, she wakes herself up by flailing her arms. Its pretty frustrating. Last week (Feb. 2 to be exact) we had some minor success with getting her to sleep in her crib. She only did two hour stretches, but it was a start. Since then, though, she screams as soon as we put her on her back. She falls asleep fine in my arms, but the minute we lie her down, it all goes downhill. She won't sleep in her pack and play anymore, either. Sunday night we were so tired we just lugged her swing upstairs and let her sleep in it (which she hasn't done at night for about three weeks). She did pretty well, but then refused to nap in it on Monday. And her swing is the only place she will nap! Arg. That little Lucy is an enigma. Last night we let her sleep in bed with us. Not ideal, but we all got some

rest. I feel sure this saga is to be continued! :)

*I should say that I don't by any means expect Lucy to be sleeping through the night at this point. She is still a tiny baby and breastfed babies digest their food much faster than formula-fed babies. I don't want to give her formula or add anything to her food to make her sleep longer. I just would like for her to go back to having at least one fourish hour stretch of sleep.*

Lucy is still a smiling machine. She loves to smile at Andrew and she tries to mimic him when he sticks his tongue out at her. She's pretty cute! She has been sitting in her Bumbo seat for short periods of time, and still loves playing on her playmat. We think she is getting pretty close to being able to laugh! Sometimes she smiles so big and with such an open mouth it rea

lly looks like she is laughing - she just needs some sound to go with it!

BIG NEWS!!

I love Lucy. Everybody knows that. But her sleeping habits were leaving a little to be desired. She only liked to sleep in her swing, or even better, in someone's arms. Okay during the day, but night was a whole different story. She was super restless in her swing and always managed to maneuver herself into a very uncomfortable-looking position. Lucy hated the swaddle. HATED. Even in the hospital she didn't like having her arms pinned down. She liked sleeping on her belly, but I am a nervous nellie and while she was sleeping peacefully, I was up every 3o minutes making sure she was still breathing! Needless to say, we weren't getting much sleep! :)

Well... ta dah! Something clicked for my beautiful baby this week and she is now sleeping in her bassinet on her BACK swaddled! YAY!! The past four nights in a row she has slept four and a half hours, up to eat, and then back down! I am so, so proud of her. I feel much less nervous with her on her back so I am getting more sleep too!

Lucy is 8 weeks old and I think we are really starting to get into our groove. She had a really rough day on Tuesday (super fussy, and I could not make her happy) but the rest of this week she was awesome! She has been playing a ton on her new playmat, smiling and cooing like crazy, and even - dare I say it - not screaming her head off when she is riding in the car! (Thankfully, some online advice I got really seemed to do the trick! I roll down the window and let the cool air and white noise soothe her!)

Lucy and Mommy ventured out to the mall this week and also had a playdate with Gavin! Then, Friday night brought Lucy's first snow! We went out, but it was soooo cold. She didn't like it!

She is getting to be so much fun! She still loves her baths, loves playing, and is a huge smiler! She is also working on laughing - she opens her mouth super wide while she's smiling and makes happy squeals! And... yesterday, she rolled belly to back! She has her two month pediatrician appointment on Friday (shots... yuck!) and I can't wait to see how big she's gotten!

Almost 7 Weeks!

I can't believe Lucy will be 7 weeks on Saturday! (Doesn't it seem like all my posts begin with I can't believe...) She is getting so big and is so much more alert and lots and lots of fun.

Lucy is definitely a morning baby, which is so weird because I definitely wouldn't qualify either Andrew or myself as a morning person. After we get out of bed and she eats, she is so much fun! She plays on her mat and coos and smiles and is generally happy. It is so cute! However, if she misses her 930ish nap, watch out! The wrath of Lucy is not to messed with! She still takes most of her naps (who am I kidding, all of her naps) either in her swing or on a person, but we are starting to make some progress getting her to sleep in the bassinet part of her pack and play. Andrew and I keep talking about taking the plunge and putting her to bed in her crib, but we're both chicken :) She just seems so tiny when she is in there and the crib is this huge, massive space. We'll get there!

I think her evening fussiness *may* starting to wane a little bit, although I am probably going to regret writing that. We are going to try moving bedtime up a little earlier because I think a lot of her evening crankiness has to do with being over tired. She apparently doesn't think she needs an evening nap anymore!

Miss Lucy still hates her car seat, so going places is a little stressful but we have gone out the past 9 days in a row! Hopefully she will start to get used to it!

We are on Operation Thumb Sucking Watch 2010 - she is trying so hard to figure out how to get her thumb in her mouth! For now, she sticks her fist in her mouth and smacks her gums together (loudly) and moves it all around, but she still hasn't figured out the right angle. It is adorable! She has also started to develop a strong grip on things - she will hold on to my shirt with both hands while she eats, or her blanket in her swing, and even Andrew's hands as he holds her bottle.

And now... for something even better than a picture of Lucy, check out this talking baby! I love her!

Five Weeks!

**Scroll down - I just posted our One Month post from Tuesday... I apparently forgot to hit publish.. oops!**

So our little lady is five weeks old (five weeks, one day actually)! In some ways it seems like time is flying by, but in other ways it seems like she has been here forever! We had her one month pediatrician appointment on Thursday and Lucy is doing wonderfully!

Weight: 7 pounds, 15 ounces (still a peanut, but she has gained two pounds since birth!)

Length: 20 inches

Our pediatrician (I love our pediatrician, by the way!) said Lucy looks perfect and AGAIN said that Andrew and I seem very calm and relaxed. We are, thank you very much :) Lucy didn't even scream the whole time we were there. I fed her between being weighed and seeing the doctor and she was nice and calm. What a good baby! She won't go back until she is two months for all of her vaccines... I think that is going to be a rough one!

Lucy is still an eating machine, eating every hour and a half during the day. At night she will go one long stretch, anywhere from three and a half to *once* five hours, but then she wakes up every hour and a half for the rest of the night. She has started taking a bottle at night, though, which is going to be really nice when we want to go out to eat or take her some place where nursing isn't really a great option! Being an eating machine leads to being a pooping machine too! On Thursday morning, Lucy "got" me good - three times in one diaper change. It was hilarious and disgusting all at the same time!

This week, Lucy started getting pretty fussy in the evenings. Tuesday evening was actually the most upset we have ever seen the poor monkey - she screamed for hours straight. Between 5 and 8 every night this week she has been pretty fussy and refusing to nap even though she is exhausted, but we are working through it. She cluster feeds like crazy so I usually just end up parked on the couch with her. Andrew cuts up my dinner and serves it to me on a pillow - he's a keeper!

On Wednesday, Lucy had her first play date with Gavin. Gavin in my friend Holly's 7-month-old. He is HUGE! He weighs 21 pounds and having them right beside each other was hilarious. He loved Lucy and screamed and clapped the whole time we were there. She just slept and ate :)

Friday night, Lucy attended her second birthday party, this time for my friend Katie. She did super well at the restaurant until right around the time the food came, and then she decided she was ready to eat! She also had fun back at Katie's mom's house being passed around and adored by everyone.

The most exciting thing that is happening in our little world is Lucy is starting to smile. REAL smiles. She has worked those smile muscles since day 1, but I think she is actually starting to smile now to show us she is happy. Check it out for yourselves!

One Month!!

Lucy Katherine is one month old today... what a big girl! Stats coming after her pediatrician appointment on Thursday :)